Latest rants


Location: USA
Job: Healthcare

Sooooo coworker thinks that she does so much work. Actually the whole department does. What a joke! Everyone else knows the truth. Can’t say anything because when the boss opens her mouth your fucking voice comes out. The fakeness you provide everyone is priceless. Your life is pathetic, you’re pathetic, and so is your boss. She should stop drinking on the weekends because it shows on Mondays when she is hungover. She also is fake. She talks shit on other department heads constantly. Oh don’t let me forget the favoritism. It’s actually sad that you and her think you have good lives. You get Michael Kors when your dick-sucking boyfriend throws you down the steps. Oh and yeah your boss talked shit on that too. You and her are sneaky, untrustworthy, and useless. Maybe you guys should go work in retail. Where you belong. I fucking hate you both.


Are you serious?


My colleagues are the laziest bastards on the planet. They have not done one piece of work this week. Not one bit in two days. The job we do is a piece of piss, if everyone did a little bit each day there wouldn’t be an issue. Can’t wait to leave this place, it’s a total joke


One year

Location: 7 th ring of hell USA
Job: Asst manager

Only one year , I can pay off the car and the mortgage. One year to work for the fattest, smelliest man that I have ever met in my life. He tethers me to him because no one can stand him at the company. He thinks that we are friends, dude we are not and I must be a complete socio to pull this off.

Management straight up the chain… nuts

One year

I even have a countdown clock…seconds…


You F***ing Brat

Location: U.S.
Job: Chef

You are a goddamn brat! An absolute piece of shit who throws tantrums whenever you don’t get your way! Guess what? You have no authority! You never did! You have no power, no influence, everyone fucking hates you, so just do us all a favor and leave! You cannot go a goddamn day without crying, screaming, or throwing a tantrum! And we also know that you have been stealing from us! For some reason the boss hasn’t fired you but hopefully that will change once we tell him about your stealing. Pull your head out of your fucking ass and go back to the hell you crawled from!



Location: Mars
Job: Idiot

If you spent more time on doing your job, instead of looking for attention, you would be quite good.

Your attention seeking is cringe-worthy. In a 3-year-old it would be charming, but a little annoying after 3 hours. In a giant old woman it’s hideous after several years.Continue reading


I hate these assholes

Location: USA
Job: Chief Comms Officer

For those of you who think it gets any easier once you reach the top of the corporate ladder — surprise, it doesn’t. You’re still surrounded by the same dumb, ineffectual little shits that were in the trenches with you 20 years ago.

I’m on a leadership team with 2 of the most weak-minded, gossipy, sexist idiots I have ever met. Here we are in the middle of a fucking pandemic and they are holed up in their office whispering and ridiculing staff who are scared to return to work. And pressuring me to return when I am immunocompromised. And they refuse to follow the safety protocols THEY put in place.

Piece of shit. I fucking hate this place.I pray to the karma gods they get what they deserve.



Location: US
Job: Sales

I am not in competition with you, I am just trying to live my life. Everything I write or do, you make a version of for yourself that adds a bit extra. I write my profile saying “X years experience. ..” you write “over X years experience”. I write “local and national”, you write “blah blah international”.

It’s cool, I am happy for you, it’s not my fault you are older than me but aren’t qualified or registered to do my job. You can do my job when you earn the qualification, and get registered too. Then your extras will mean something, and you can smile because you will have won! I won’t care, however, because I will be getting on with my job.


I love my coworkers

Location: Dreamland
Job: Spread hearts and flowers

I love you both, dear sweet old ladies. Always a kind word for each other, never leaving a sad silent moment. Filling the air, (and airspace, and media space) with your constant, insightful thoughts on the lives of everyone. Your sweet voices trill on subjects dear to us all, and you share your wisdom and love without discrimination!Continue reading


F*** you both

Location: Uk
Job: Charity

From being two giant babies, with misplaced confidence, and card carrying bullies, you are now acting like you care.

When I had to placate you and beg you to behave like adults, coaxing you to do your jobs, desperately hoping you might at least try, without giving backchat and veiled insults to everyone else, you were grinning from ear to ear.Continue reading


Join now!

Enter your email to receive notifications of new rants

Vote for us!

Give Workrant a thumbs up at Urban Dictionary