Latest rants

Hate being a doctor

Location: United States
Job: Physician

Yes, I am a doctor. And yes, I can be allowed to vent.

I hate patients. I hate nurses. I hate the hospital. But most of all, I hate other doctors. Arrogant, smug, greedy, know it all pieces of crap.

My message to the world: Do not become a doctor. Do anything else. Dig ditches. Lay brick. Sweep floors.

Anything beats this.


Dear God


Please keep those evil little trolls that come out either at night or early morning. Also make sure to keep the cockroaches, rats, flying rats, and other disgusting creatures away as well. Also help me find the red headed green bastard who has the pot of gold. I know the rainbow light I walk through it, but make sure to knock him out so I can take the gold and quit this unbearably awful environment for a bright future. Thanks god!


I know

Location: US
Job: Poddwelling

Dear chatty Kathy, you conniving windbag. Why don’t you sit down and do your job instead of spreading lies and gossip? You narcissistic sociopath!


The smiling snitch

Location: Scotland
Job: It is a secret

You are the archetypal pack rat. You follow the boss around like a pathetic shadow desperate to report your observations. Anything that is said to you is reported back quick smart, if the boss is out then you’ll text. What a total sycophant you are!

We all loathe you! You swan around like you are the boss but don’t know there are memes about you that are made and shared to the mutual amusement of the majority of staff.

You tell us that you get interviews for promoted posts in other workplaces but then change your mind about going for it. Why? Fear of failure or the knowledge that you will be a little fish in a big pond?

You tease us with the prospect of you fucking off but then pull the figurative rug from under our feet when you change your mind. This brings me to the conclusion that you tell us about these interviews to project your ego and smug air of superiority over us.

Well guess what? We are both paid the same and parallel of the organisational chart.

We laugh at you, you are hated! Do us all a favour and piss off into obscurity!

Thanks for this opportunity to rant, it is really cathartic.


Done with you all…absolutely done!

Location: Trumplandia
Job: Government

People are dumb. Completely stupid. If you’re not a mouth-breather, you’re a cave-dweller. I work for the good ol’ US government and it’s amazing how many people still operate under the delusion that the government cares about them and their problems. I’ve heard a million sob stories told a million different ways.

“I don’t have any money!”
“I’m homeless”
“So and so over here just died!”

Each story becoming more and more outlandish in hopes that I will be moved into giving them what they want, which is always just one thing: money. Everybody has their hand stretched out, thinking that if they can’t find a job and have no money to go to the store and buy their Honey Buns, the government will step in and pay for them for the rest of their lives. Jackass called in today telling me that he was never going to be able to work again and needed his disability because he suffers from Degenerative Disc Disease. Hey! Asswipe! Everyone does! Stop being a damn burden on the taxpayer and get a friggin’ job! Stop wasting tax dollars appealing every damn government decision in hopes that you’ll be awarded a bunch of FREE money!Continue reading


Join now!

Enter your email to receive notifications of new rants

Vote for us!

Give Workrant a thumbs up at Urban Dictionary