Sooooooo you felt the need to make numerous complaints about me until it resulted in my desk being moved away from yours because I was “disruptive”. I get that you may not like me, frankly I do not care if you like me or not. The fact that you have made it your life’s mission to try to make my work life a misery shows me what a sad, sorry individual you are. Now that my desk has been moved you still feel the need to stomp past it about 15 times a day making a point of not looking at me as you do so. Well guess what? Everything you have done has had nothing but positive impacts on my work life because I love my new desk position and the people that I sit with now find me to be a great addition to the work area. I see that you are still a sour faced bitch and no doubt will find someone else to target shortly. Well suck it, because my life rocks and yours obviously does not.
Job: Contract Administrator
My workplace is such a living hell. A wide sea of gray cubicles stretching out forever, people crammed in like sardines. It is inhumane. Such a rich company and they give so little back to their employees. The CEO is a fucking tard. Women are not paid as much as men and have most of the low paying jobs. Good luck advancing in this company if you are a woman. You will rot in your cubicle forever. Men are such incredible selfish and disgusting human beings. Truly. They think they are so smart and capable. I bet they treat their wives like shit and are slobs at home. Why do men think they are so important. They are far inferior in every way. I hate my boss the worst. He is dumb. Just really incompetent. Yet he makes three times as much as I do. Why? Because he’s one of the pack. It is really depressing as hell. I hope they all get what they ultimately deserve.
Job: Customer Rep
To my fatass employer: Your Boston accent makes you sound retarded. It wouldn’t be so bad if you weren’t actually retarded. But you are. You are super annoying and unintelligent. Keep shoveling those pizzas in your face. I hope your pants pop open during your next sales presentation. You got your job because you are a man. Stop treating women like they are second class citizens. I don’t know where you found your wife but god help her. I would love to throw you in the lake and watch the alligators eat you. I want you gone from this planet.
You lemming. You think you are so fucking important with your stupid ass job. Please get it through that thick head of yours that you are seriously dumb. Why do you think that you are so fucking smart when you are borderline retarded? You deserve nothing in life for the pain you have caused people. No one respects you. You think you are so liked? Why is it that when I walk out to my car most nights, someone will inevitably bitch about you. You fucking coward. You talk in generalities. Why don’t you just say what you mean you motherfucker. I hate you and wish you would die a slow and painful death. I hope you get a terrible skin rotting disease. I hope your house burns down with your family in it.
Harold, you are an uneducated, slovenly prick who happens to have a high level job because you suck dick. Also our company seems to like loud mouthed white males who talk shit. Your stomach hangs over your pants by about a foot. If you were any shorter it would hang on the ground. You’re not even 40 years old but you look like you are at least 55.
You think you are so important because of your stupid job but really you are just a piece of shit and I hope something bad happens to you. I hope you get even fatter. I hope you get so fat that you will have to be buried in a piano box. You deserve it for being an egotistical douchebag. God help your wife. She is probably as putrid as you are. There is someone for everyone. Enjoy that big ham sub tomorrow for lunch. I hope you choke on it and die. I hope you fall off a cliff and birds eat your remains.
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