I don’t know what to do

My boss recently got offered a job at a better university, and wants to move the whole lab there. But I don’t really want to move. I am not looking forward to feeling the isolation I know I would feel when completely uprooting. People like to say that ‘I’ll make new friends and branch out’, but I’m very uncomfortable with new people, so I don’t really see that happening. The fact that I have any friends is somewhat of a miracle, but that’s besides the point.

It’s not just the lack of friends I would have there. I just moved closer to this job so that I can work more efficiently. And as everyone knows, moving is a pain in the ass

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. So to have to move again in so short a time, I feel, is somewhat unfair. I know the neighborhoods around where I live and know where to get a cheaper place to live. However, at the new location, everything is so expensive, I almost can’t afford to live, even if I share with roommates.

Plus, I don’t even really like my boss. As a boss, he’s never really around and he is obsessed with publishing in high impact journals. So much so that I don’t think I’ll ever publish anything since he wants so many extra experiments. I couldn’t care less where I publish my work just as long as I have a publication to show my work. ‘publish or perish’ is a real concern for me. He also has talked down to me multiple times, implying I’m incompetent. Even if he apologizes, I don’t think he’s sincere. Anyway, I don’t know what to do. If I don’t follow, I’m out of a job. Some people have mentioned that the better university would look better on my CV and would make it easier to find a job in the future. But I’m not sure if it’s worth it. Any advice?

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One Comment

  1. Look, change is difficult. I deal with it more now and it’s very difficult for me. Everything is changing, change happens even when unnecessary and I detest unnecessary change…people are just changing things up to change them not for a reason…I hate that! Honestly, when this type of a big change is in the works for me, I go into prayer. I try not to talk it to death to friends and family because for the most part they are not as interested in the work I do, they are not vested in it. OR, they have no concept of what I am talking about….So I go into prayer and I listen to what is happening around me and I look for signs and direction. Maybe it is time for you to look into going to another university where you will be more appreciated. I know it will involve a move, but one way or another, a move is going to happen, you just have to decide if the move is going to make you happy or miserable. Go with happy! Always go with happy. If you can’t find another university, and you HAVE to make this change, then do it knowing you are looking for something more. Maybe this new place will give you and opportunity to grow in a different direction. Good luck & God bless.

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