Things I want to say:
1) Don’t do exactly what I said not to do.
2) A warranty doesn’t cover stupidity.
3) Getting a new machine won’t fix a software problem.
4) No, you are not hacked.
5) Don’t forget the password you just set 5 minutes ago!
6) Yes, I’m working on a holiday.
7) No, giving your kid an expensive ass machine was a stupid idea.
8) No…it’s not a free replacement.
9) Yes, you have to try what I’m telling you.
10) No, I’m not marrying you.